Do you find yourself having the same fight over and over again? About money, the dishes, or who plans the dates. Maybe you're embarking on a transition such as having a child, opening up, or otherwise changing your relationship structure. Perhaps you've been wanting to bring something up for a long time but feel afraid to say it.
We all grew up in our unique families of origin with different identities and circumstances. Our life experiences made us who we are today, which is what makes us so lovable, and this also means we have different wounds that might get triggered in relationships. Part of the work of coming together as a couple is building awareness about our own stuff and cultivating empathy for our partner's stuff. Chances are the fight you're having about the dishes isn't actually about the dishes.
I help couples look at the dynamics happening underneath their impasses, build mutual understanding, and improve communication. As we do this, I may suggest ways to move towards each other to bridge the gaps and/or differentiate between what is each person's personal responsibility. My goal is to create a brave space for you both to speak to your experiences, deeply understand your issues, and make choices about how to move towards a more fulfilling connection with each other.
I use a social justice lens and carefully attend to issues of power, oppression, and privilege as they show up in your relationship and in my relationship with you. I am kink and polyamory affirming.
I have worked with couples on a range of issues, but some of my areas of interest and specialty are:
You can email me at firstname.lastname@example.org or give me a call at 415-570-8603.